Negative situations are not in our lives to show us we are stuck with them or that we are bad people. Such situations happen to offer us a mirror like reflection of what we think about ourselves, or what we feel we deserve. If we find ourselves in situations we do not really prefer, we have given ourselves a very clear opportunity to change. One way to allow ourselves a chance to find out and discover who and what we are is by seeing so many examples, and creating interactions with a number of different individuals that represent who we are not. This is a very effective method of validating our true and natural selves by the simple process of elimination: Oh, I am not like that, I am not like this, I am certainly nothing like that, and so forth. Looking back on different relationships, we might say, “That wasn’t me, and that wasn’t me either. This is what I really am all about.”

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